The Green Fairy

Everyone hates a know-it-all, but in truth, I take great pride in being one. But there's nothing worse than a know-it-all who actually knows nothing.
Last night some friends and I went to Montmartre to live out some Moulin Rouge fantasies or something and attempt to get fucked up on absinthe. Totally not my idea, obviously, because I am the queen of internet research and some would have been done beforehand if I'd known ahead of time. So we got there and we wandered around. I assumed there was an actual destination, but no. Just that we were not allowed to go to a toursity place on Blvd. de Clichy cuz we'd get ripped off. Which is what ended up happening anyway, of course. It was fun and we did drink some absinthe (for 11 euros each shot) and we didn't hallucinate, but that's beside the point.
Our little bohemian ringleader whose name I won't mentioned just in case, was a pontificating moron. After reading some stuff on absinthe this morning, I've learned these things: it was banned in France for almost a century and therefore is not widely served anymore because it's difficult to make and a lot of people still think it's illegal; it IS spelled with an "h," even in French, you twit; and lastly, it was not hallucinogenic because it's stored in wormwood barrels -- wormwood is the name of a hallucinogenic herb used in the preparation of absinthe. So suck on that, you tool box.
Other than that the night was very fun and I actually ended up learning that one of my friends wrote two books before age 13 and used to do motivational speaking engagements in schools. At 19, he likes to fart on people. Go figure!